20 Comments

Perfect piece Jane. You've summed up all the thinking I've been doing re. transitioning to using a visible mobility aid. It's a big step to take, and it will come with at least one weird conversation with a stranger (why do humans do so much thinking out loud!!!).

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Thank you Eliza. Good luck for if and when you do. The majority of people I encounter as a mobility aid user are totally cool with it, but there have still been too many weird and inappropriate remarks for me to treat it as a one off!

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humanity's capacity for blurting out inappropriateness when faced with situations that are mildly surprising to them is fathomless

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I think I’m starting to develop a radar for it now! 🤣

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First I wanted to say I adore your photos - the colourful watermark (I don’t know what else to call it) always makes me so happy!

Second - thank you for this heartfelt piece. I too have finger marks and scratches on my walls and furniture - and the odd blood stain from bad falls. It’s a reminder that I’m not steady… and try as I might to make things work I’m falling down more than I should be.

I always get back up - but surely it would be better to avoid the falling in the first place? What’s holding me back? Definitely concerns over feeling like a fraud. Stress over where I will put a large electric chair (my condo is barely 600 square feet) and denial that my condition has progressed this much.

I know it’s counterintuitive- but there’s a part of me that feels like as long as I don’t take that next step I can pretend that it’s “not that bad”. Kinda silly when you consider all the injuries I’ve had from falling down.

I take solace knowing I’m not alone - it sounds like most of us struggle with taking the plunge and accepting that we need mobility aids.

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Thank you so much Kelly. I hope the post helped, even if it’s just to feel less alone with it all. It certainly helps me to read the experiences of others. I’ve definitely moved into the “mobility aids are freedom” mindset but I really appreciate that this is a process, and some denial is completely normal. Appreciate that space is a consideration too. I really hope you work through all this and above all keep safe. If a mobility aid helps you to do that, I’d encourage you to go for it! 💕

(The photo filter is from Picsart! 😁)

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I did help - and I think it’s helping a lot of other people as well!

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Love your humour, Jane. In carers UK forum we coined the phrase 'Caresplaining' worse than mansplaining because at least that's somewhat understood and called out...we get told what we should (swear word) be feeling/saying/doing...empathy-on-strike. Very glad we found each other! ;-)

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Thanks Victoria! Ha, caresplaining, I hadn’t heard of that, but I totally get it. Sounds a bit like the sort of thing people with chronic illnesses/disabilities often get ie “ooh you should try kale/goat yoga/wombat milk/insert-any other intervention, and I’m sure it will help you” aargh! 💕

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✅Parkour - just said that to sis recently.

✅hiking poles - my preference as I think my posture is better with them that my foldable walking stick.

✅ bluebadge - held off for a while but it is handy .

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Ha! You with the parkour too!

And interesting how we find what suits us eventually - turned out the hiking poles didn’t work for me so I replaced them with a cane and rollator!

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Hi Jane that’s brilliant- Helen (A+C), I just realised it was you! X

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👋 thanks so much Helen! Xx

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Brilliant again - it's battling that inner negative voice and neverending thoughts about how best to proceed that leaves us unable to see the wood for the trees.

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Ah god the thoughts… so true. But somehow we get there and when we do the view can be amazing 💕

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Omg Jane you did it again!!! It was like you’ve tapped into my brain. You have hit the nail on the head (that’s surmising you still have hand eye coordination)😂 everything you said and particularly the grubby fingerprints had me laughing out loud 🤣. Brilliant just brilliant xx

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Thank you so much Jo! Ah you too with the fingerprints 🤣. And yes please do not ask me to hit a nail on the head, my DIY days are over 😂.

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Think you've just ruined Lord of the Rings forever. 😁 Good read, Sis👍 X

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And now great perils lay before me 🤣. Ta very much R kid 💛

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🤣

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